Getting back to work after babies.

Life leads us down strange paths. We grow up and go to school, college and beyond. We are constantly reminded about what amazing careers we can have, how we can earn lots of money, use our experience and our brains to be the best, climb the career ladder, be respected by our peers and work our butts off to prove we can do the best we can.

And then we get pregnant...

How quickly life can change. From climbing and climbing the ladder at work, our priorities suddenly change. As our tummies get bigger, our thoughts turn to those of motherhood. Suddenly, that project deadline isn't as vital as it used to be, and that database doesn't look quite as exciting as the new Fisher Price bouncer chair.  And then maternity leave starts.

UK mothers are lucky, we have a right to leave our workplace and still receive some income. Some bigger companies are very generous and will pay a very decent maternity pay to their employees, meaning that we can spend a year or so off work, and still be paid.  All too easily that year could be extended, or another baby comes along, the visits to take baby up to meet your colleagues and talk shop diminish as they are taken over by baby groups, toddler play and new mummy friends.

Maybe a year, two or five later, your little darling starts nursery or school and you feel that you are ready to get back to work.  But after such a long break, is your old job there to welcome you back? Unfortunately, employers aren't obliged to keep jobs open more than a year, and then the barrage of questions arise including: do I want to work full time? Do I want to work full time and then the additional 10 hours of overtime in my high powered job? Do I want to have to travel the world every other week.

Some women, quite understandably DO want to do that. They have had their break to have the babies and now want to get back into what they do best, and continue up the ladder of career success, others want to get more of an equal balance of home and work time and will look at part time jobs. It doesn't matter what you want to do, it matters how you give yourself the confidence to do it.

The thought of getting back into work after a long break can be terribly frightening. These thoughts include but are certainly not limited to
- what if I can't do my job anymore? What if technology has changed too much and I can't keep up? What if I don't want to work more than 20 hours, what if I go to work and I get a call to say my child is sick?

These thoughts make us feel scared, nervous, anxious, and certainly won't give us the power to hold our heads up high and get back into the field.  As a result, you may be more reluctant to apply for those jobs you know you could have done with your eyes shut a few years ago. You may not know what to put on your CV for the time you've not worked and the pressure of the unknown builds up.

But it doesn't have to be like that at all.
Firstly, decide how much time you want to spend at work, and how much at home. Decide how much money you would like to earn and earmark the sort of jobs you were doing BB (before baby) and what you might like to do now.

Secondly, when you write your CV, remember all the skills you had then, and haven't lost (it's difficult to lose skills without losing anatomy).  Add to that the skills you've gained as a mother, multi-tasking, project management, event planning, diary organising and you have already added additional quality to your CV.

Think about everything you are capable of and how much you have already achieved, think of the feelings that generates. Picture yourself at work and think about how that makes you feel.  How powerful, how clever, motivated you can be and then take those positive feelings, and put them in a power suit and go sell yourself at an interview. You know how great you can be, so tell your interviewer. Tell them you can tackle anything thrown at you (literally, you know that from having a baby). Your positivity will shine through and before you know it, your biggest quandary will be which job to take, how many hours to commit and what to wear on your first day.

Once you start your new job, you will find you are exhausted. You will do a days' work, come home and do a days' parenting,  and then collapse in a heap once the babies are asleep.  This is what ready meals and takeaways are made for. It won't be like that every day, you will gain your balance and realise that some things are not as important as others (tidying the house for one). Within a couple of weeks you will have forgotten how much time you had away from work to start with and will remember that not all conversations need to include nappies, nursery's and naughty nippers in them.